Shit just gets realer.

My sincerest apologies, my god it has been so long.. I can’t even begin to express how many nights I’ve thought of posting only to distract myself with sleep or something. Shit getting realer, I hope this finds you when you need it most.

I’ve been growing and life has certainly brought about blessings in challenges I would not have envisioned in a million years. Yet here I am stronger than ever, as I allow my new candle to burn I knew it was time to come here. I missed you WordPress family. Shit is real, you knew that though.

I had a revelation this evening/morning. My focus is very clear. It wasn’t foggy per say yet it was misty at most. I am now in my third trimester baring my first child, and as I type this I am overwhelmed with joy knowing the journey this has been. I’ve created life with many projects, never an experience like this. This is a beautiful phase in my life, it has not been the easiest, yet it’s worth every moment. I am valuing the time, the lessons and the evolution that’s taking place within and around me. I’m never one to get too personal, at least not yet. Just know I’m in a great space and it’s elevating me to the greatest realm I could ever ask for. It’s wild to me though… how we ask for things and never think of how we will actually receive them; we envision how we would like to obtain what we desire, yet we limit our vision from the limitless possibilities the universe has in store for us. The reality is always much rawer and better than the fantasy, our fantasy serves our present state, the universe serves us for our highest good. Regardless of how long it takes us to accept it, it’s truly better when we let go of resistance and follow the desire to fruition with no limitation. It’s hard for the ego to accept this, yet the spirit is so satisfied. We must never deny this, the ego doesn’t know shit, it is a shield we use when we want to resist the natural order of things. Do you want to remain in your happy state? Or do you want to prove your ego right? Your ego can see but so far, your spirit, however, knows no boundaries. The infinite joy can be manifested in so many ways.

We can cry and pout about how our vision isn’t exactly what was given, for what? We got what we asked for in the best way to not only satisfy the spirit but to help us grow to another level as well. We don’t ever stop wanting, we can’t ever stop growing. There is no country for the stagnant. Not where I’m from. You can give in to your lower ego self and allow petty distractions to slow you up and keep you at a standstill, or you can rise up to the occasion, own it and grow through every experience regardless of how it’s perceived by you or anyone else. Life is so beautiful.

I’m back, I was resistant to the many changes I’m experiencing, not in a negative way rather a stubborn way, this is new to me. As much as I love and embrace change, I never felt this to the degree I’m experiencing now. It’s many things, and it’s everything. I am in control and I have let it go. That was my resistance. Wanting to control how I adjust, when in reality I just had to put more of that energy into trusting this process. I’ve battled with trust issues on different levels throughout life, thus my need for control and with projects it’s easy to be in control, I am the creator. However, there’s a level of creativity that requires no control, allowing God and the universe to handle what you don’t need to… despite your urge to want to, using that as an excuse to determine your role as creator. Shit really get realer, and as my baby girl kicks as rapidly as I’m typing this, I’m so blessed. I am aware. I have not fallen victim to my circumstances and ego. I have risen and continue to rise above this and it feels great, I am so ready to continue this journey as I am to express and push all that I love and have within me.

I really must force sleep now, a long productive day awaits, already I’ve gotten so much done. I’m happy to be back. I will be posting more. So many topics I want to discuss. Just remember, progress is perfect, keep moving stay sturdy and keep calm. It’s all in your favor.


Shit real.

Do you feel the changes?

Can you feel the shift beneath your feet?

Are you panicking at this unknown burst of emotion that you feel the need to tie to negative thoughts?

Shit is so real…. and this is great!!

So much is happening, for the better as always… how long will it take you to see it? I know you gotta feeeeel it.

You know what’s really good? When you catch yourself moving differently in seeming similar situations. Choosing the better and more progressive options. When you realize how much you’re growing and how AMAZING this feeling is. So fucking amazing just knowing all the reasons why you can’t explain it is more than enough.


You don’t gotta explain shit to nobody, especially the numb. It’s like talking to a brick wall.

For the first time in a long time, you feeeel it so deeply you don’t even doubt it.

You know.

Shit real.

Flowing towards your desires, satisfied NOT patient with the process, enjoying and learning from the progress and everything becomes perfect all of a sudden.

Coinwinky dink? I think not.

Always at the right time, I’m reminded I can do no wrong.

Everything is everything.

I have more than I need to continuously reach/ sustain my goals and on a daily it amazes me at how much gets done with focus and clear intentions.

Honesty will forever remain the BEST policy.

You will ALWAYS get what you want. Be clear on what that is, and don’t contradict it. You don’t need to. Trust that.

Few things I wanna share, I’ll just meditate for now.



Shoutout to all my wolves, even the ones in sheep's clothing.

Taken by me, on AdonisT6 with my extendo lens, on a rooftop in the Bronx, NY
August 6, 2017 9:30pm

Fucking beautiful !!! The radiance captu(red) below doesn't do the reality of that energy any justice… breathtaking really.

I'm learning more about catching focus, I'm so in love with the moon, forever catching my eye.


4th Quarter

Always room for improvement, what could you enhance?

Are you willing to shake shit up and implement new methods in your daily life for the sake of progression?

Too many fear change, for what? I don't know. All change is good. Even when we label it as bad, the bad makes us better. Every single time this is proven, on all scales of this spectrum of life. Why do we easily forget? Why is it that we are so adamant about being right, with the wrong things… it's okay to be wrong, when you want to be so right about the wrong things… things that don't matter, things that aren't conducive to your progression…. you just want to be right in your demise…
"see I told you this wouldn't work out"

Whether you think you can or you can't… you're right.
That's such a powerful quote, reflecting mind over matter….

we are so conditioned to envision worst case scenarios; attach our contradicting feelings to it, manifest the worst case scenario just to validate our sick way of being.

Why don't we easily envision the best case scenario? It seems far fetched? Those outside voices of limiting and narrow minded people echo in your brain? We don't ever want to be tooooo good, or too far ahead of everyone else, then we feel wrong, because we are leaving others behind, we are no longer relating to a self fulfilling prophecy of demise and desperation… and that scares many of us. Why would it? Most of our loved ones are over there…. and we don't want them to feel beneath us, or unloved by us… which is fucking stupid to me, no matter where you or your loved ones are at in life, your progressions is YOURS. It most certainly isn't a reflection of what others can or cannot do. Focus on yourself. yet conditioning of this manner isn't rare, nor foreign concept.. at least where I'm from. Poverty is a sickness many of us aren't aware of.

Let's talk about how change is a vital piece to our emotional, mental and physical state.

Change isn't discrediting all you've done, I believe many fear change for that sole reason… If I switch it up now, that means what I did then didn't work. Nope. It's leveling up. What you did then, served its purpose, it doesn't work NOW. Understanding that clarifies so many misconceptions of growth. Growing is change. It's inevitable.. yet we fight so hard, spend so much time forcing things to remain the same, despite everything in us saying WE NEED CHANGE.

This life is ours for the creating, even if you feel you've created the ideal life for yourself; understand, there's always so much more… you can do no wrong, there is no end.

Trust the process, be clear about what you want in such a general way, the details write themselves.
Trust yourself, shit is realer than ever.


Plan A. 

A = A lot of mini plans, to one blue print. 

I’ve been wanting to speak on this as much as I’ve been wanting to speak on vulnerability… couldn’t settle on one, maybe it is one. Maybe, being vulnerable is the ultimate goal in all our masterplans.. I’ve been absorbing, as I observe my plans continuously in action even when I stand still.  Amazing. I’m fucking in awe, and alert. There is no coincidence. Shit is real. 

Peep game. 

Vulnerability has a nasty stigma to it, it makes me cringe… I’m getting out of it so I will be using it more often, in an open sense. See being open gets you far…. you see opportunities beyond your guarded ways, you are open to giving, as much if not more than you are receiving. You are uplifted with the winds of wealth on many scales….. if you are well equipped mentally. Mind over matter. 

In our society, weak is correlated to vulnerability… although definition states you’re more open to harm, NOT weakened by it. Nobody wants to be tooo open. It’s way too risky, people are fearful of even appearing vulnerable, let alone allowing themselves the ability to see how beneficial being vulnerable can be. You grow when you are open, regardless of risk.. you train well enough for anything you can take some pain. 

How focused are you? 

Do you train your mind, body and soul the way dedicated athletes, dancers and philosophers do? 

Plan A is a folder with every other plan you can think of. 

You want one thing. 

You know what that is. 

You work towards it everyday, every waking moment you think of it, every thing and one you love seems to bring you back to this ONE  THOUGHT, and somehow you feel you’re not there yet? You’re not where??? You’re right here! This is it! Don’t you get it?? Shit is for real. The picture on the box isn’t assembled inside, put the pieces together accordingly.. you know what fits, don’t fear being open enough to grasp that. You are in it. Every step is adding to your journey, getting you closer… be satisfied with it, just don’t confuse with it stagnancy. You know the end goal. If no one else knows, YOU do. 
You don’t need back up plans in the event of, nah fuck that.. there is no just in case, or you never know. No you do know. You know what you want… stick to that, plan A. You owe yourself that much, shit we all do. That’s why we need reminders. 

Stay focused. 


Hey high. 

It’s been a while… I’ve thought of you often… it’s not that I don’t have anything to say, I just don’t know where to start… what to leave out. 

Shit is real. Yeah I’m high as shit… regular.. I’m more open though, I’m very happy with how open I’ve become and how much has opened up for me as I continue on this path of mine. 
I’m in a pretty fucking great space internally… new grounds that I’m eagerly exploring, revealing the growth from where I once fea(red) my unknown potential…
See you are all you think you are, yet that’s not ALL you are… you are more. Way more than you can envision for yourself at this point in time… 

“Don’t be patient, be satisfied.” — to be patient means you’re waiting, and on your journey motion is constant… to ignore the motions will always make you feel like a patient in a waiting room. Pay attention, be satisfied knowing the signs are revealing how all you desire and work towards are unfolding for you in ways you couldn’t imagine… twice as better, you get to see it come to fruition, what are you waiting for exactly?  
Keep Calm, it’s all working out perfectly. 



I used to hate the smell of flowers, that was back when I was dead. I now realize the scent of life made it clear how dead and numb I was to life. I am alive now, I am more alive than I have ever been. It’s reflective in all aspects of my life how lively I am, for that I am eternally grateful. I am in love with nature. So imagine my suprise when I got wind of the Thailand orchid exhibit opening day was this past Sunday, at the NY Botanical Garden in the Bronx. I had the perfect day with perfect company to top a perfect weekend… I took some photos of the exhibit, here they are… I can’t upload all 250+ but these are some of my favorites.