My sincerest apologies, my god it has been so long.. I can’t even begin to express how many nights I’ve thought of posting only to distract myself with sleep or something. Shit getting realer, I hope this finds you when you need it most.
I’ve been growing and life has certainly brought about blessings in challenges I would not have envisioned in a million years. Yet here I am stronger than ever, as I allow my new candle to burn I knew it was time to come here. I missed you WordPress family. Shit is real, you knew that though.
I had a revelation this evening/morning. My focus is very clear. It wasn’t foggy per say yet it was misty at most. I am now in my third trimester baring my first child, and as I type this I am overwhelmed with joy knowing the journey this has been. I’ve created life with many projects, never an experience like this. This is a beautiful phase in my life, it has not been the easiest, yet it’s worth every moment. I am valuing the time, the lessons and the evolution that’s taking place within and around me. I’m never one to get too personal, at least not yet. Just know I’m in a great space and it’s elevating me to the greatest realm I could ever ask for. It’s wild to me though… how we ask for things and never think of how we will actually receive them; we envision how we would like to obtain what we desire, yet we limit our vision from the limitless possibilities the universe has in store for us. The reality is always much rawer and better than the fantasy, our fantasy serves our present state, the universe serves us for our highest good. Regardless of how long it takes us to accept it, it’s truly better when we let go of resistance and follow the desire to fruition with no limitation. It’s hard for the ego to accept this, yet the spirit is so satisfied. We must never deny this, the ego doesn’t know shit, it is a shield we use when we want to resist the natural order of things. Do you want to remain in your happy state? Or do you want to prove your ego right? Your ego can see but so far, your spirit, however, knows no boundaries. The infinite joy can be manifested in so many ways.
We can cry and pout about how our vision isn’t exactly what was given, for what? We got what we asked for in the best way to not only satisfy the spirit but to help us grow to another level as well. We don’t ever stop wanting, we can’t ever stop growing. There is no country for the stagnant. Not where I’m from. You can give in to your lower ego self and allow petty distractions to slow you up and keep you at a standstill, or you can rise up to the occasion, own it and grow through every experience regardless of how it’s perceived by you or anyone else. Life is so beautiful.
I’m back, I was resistant to the many changes I’m experiencing, not in a negative way rather a stubborn way, this is new to me. As much as I love and embrace change, I never felt this to the degree I’m experiencing now. It’s many things, and it’s everything. I am in control and I have let it go. That was my resistance. Wanting to control how I adjust, when in reality I just had to put more of that energy into trusting this process. I’ve battled with trust issues on different levels throughout life, thus my need for control and with projects it’s easy to be in control, I am the creator. However, there’s a level of creativity that requires no control, allowing God and the universe to handle what you don’t need to… despite your urge to want to, using that as an excuse to determine your role as creator. Shit really get realer, and as my baby girl kicks as rapidly as I’m typing this, I’m so blessed. I am aware. I have not fallen victim to my circumstances and ego. I have risen and continue to rise above this and it feels great, I am so ready to continue this journey as I am to express and push all that I love and have within me.
I really must force sleep now, a long productive day awaits, already I’ve gotten so much done. I’m happy to be back. I will be posting more. So many topics I want to discuss. Just remember, progress is perfect, keep moving stay sturdy and keep calm. It’s all in your favor.